...speechless

"I have this feeling like I just got punched in the gut. It's a burning feeling..can't quite explain it. My chest feels tight and I feel like I might throw up at any time. I don't understand.......how.

How did we get here again?"

That was me.....yesterday. No, that was my brain yesterday. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to think. I'm just numb. Numb.

Numb.

My father...has just been diagnosed with cancer. I said to my sister that I didn't think I could do this again. Then I thought -- I have to. We have to. My only goal at this point is to keep a strong, united front for my dad. We have GOT to keep it together. Now, how do I get my mom to understand that.

More to come. Not the way I wanted to start blogging again.